slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

(via sluttyoliveoil)





Life’s too short to drink crappy coffee and cry over boys who don’t care.
– Matty Healy (the 1975)

(Source: hightydes, via givingblowjobs)






burgertv:

Looking for love? Try this line on anyone, and they will fall in love with you 100% guaranteed

(Source: BURGERTV, via zackisontumblr)




seinfelcl:

how dumb is it that we’ve created words we arent supposed to use

(via orgasm)